List of ''I'm Alan Partridge'' episodes

Alan's wife Carol has kicked him out and he is living at Linton Travel Tavern, a hotel near the A11 in Cambridgeshire. He tells the hotel's manager Susan that his wife is living with a fitness instructor and that insulting graffiti has been sprayed on his car. He encounters handyman Michael, whom he asks to remove the graffiti, but has difficulty understanding Michael due to his strong Geordie accent.

Alan and Lynn view a 5-bedroomed show house, where Alan displays his eccentric behaviour, and manages both to confuse and to bore the estate agent. Alan agrees to buy the house for £324,000, which is £1,000 less than its asking price.

Alan has lunch at BBC Television Centre with Tony Hayers (David Schneider), the fictional programme commissioner of the BBC, about the possibility of a second series of Knowing Me, Knowing You. Apparently unaware of how low his chances really are, he puts the nail in the coffin by reading out an array of ridiculous, badly thought-out programme ideas that bewilder and annoy Tony. When Tony tells him he is not to be re-commissioned, Alan thrusts a large lump of cheese into his face and flees the restaurant with the cheese.

Without a second series of his programme, Alan is nearing bankruptcy and chooses to fire the staff at his company, Peartree Productions, rather than downsize his car. However, when the staff ask him if he has a second series, Alan panics, and tells them that he has been successful.

After making various unsympathetic comments about farming on his radio show, Alan becomes an object of hatred for local farmers. But he does not have time to worry about this as he is more concerned with shooting an advertisement for a small-boating holiday company. In the hotel's bar, during an initial interview with the video executives (Peter Baynham and Simon Pegg), Alan panics and invents the ladyboy drink combination, the effects of which result in him phoning Carol, where he tries to insult her partner's car.

On his radio show, Alan interviews the leader of the local Farmers' Union (Chris Morris), but instead of apologising, enrages local farmers even further by making increasingly insane comments about farmers. On the day of the video-shoot, Alan attempts to blend in with the hard-drinking crew and again displays his chronic lack of basic social skills. During the shoot, riddled with examples of Alan's pathetic ineptitude, he is crushed by a dead cow thrown from a bridge by the disgruntled local farmers.

After a depressing afternoon hosting a small village fayre and judging the vegetable competition, Alan is delighted to discover that Tony has died and his successor, Chris Feather, had always supported and liked Alan. Attending Hayers' funeral (he knows that Chris will be there) he immediately snaps up the opportunity to finally win his sought-after second series, but not before Chris' sudden death threatens to throw his dream into tatters.

While visiting Michael at the petrol station, Alan has a chance meeting with his old teacher Frank "Sweaty" (or "Cacky") Raphael (Andrew Burt, who also provided the voice-overs for the various Radio Norwich jingles in both series). Alan convinces Raphael to let him give a talk to the sixth formers at the school where Raphael is now headmaster. Whilst at the school, Alan bumps into an old schoolmate who is now a teacher (Ian Puleston-Davies). They try to reminisce over old times, but Alan still holds a grudge against this man, who once drew a penis on the back of his school blazer in chalk; which Alan was caned for. Later Alan begins his talk to the students which, of course, all goes wrong. Alan ends up insulting Raphael for caning him when he was younger and also insults his schoolmate for "getting the lab assistant pregnant, and never sees the kid." All of this results in Alan receiving a stern talking-to in the headmaster's office.

Michael comes to stay for a few days after his front door is stolen; Alan is asked to present a sales conference for "Dante's of Reading," a company that supplies coal-effect fires and fireplaces. Dante's Piet Morant (Steve Brody), a South African, visits Alan's partially built house. After his frequent pranks with the security staff at his country club backfire and the police are called, Alan is forced to bring Piet to his partially built house. Lynn and Michael improvise some makeshift furniture in the empty house: they balance a toilet door on a Black & Decker Workmate for a table and attach several torches to a bicycle wheel for lighting. This fails to impress Morant, who is even less impressed by Alan's attempt at a South African accent or his misunderstanding of Piets pronunciation of the word 'can't'.

Alan makes a new friend at the BP garage, Dan (Stephen Mangan). They both like the same beer, use the same deodorant, and drive 'Lexii' ("the plural of Lexus"). Dan owns "Kitchen Planet" on the A416 (road) and arranges for Alan to present the Colman's Mustard Bravery Awards. Alan's attempts to impress Karen Colman are hugely unsuccessful; he even admits to her that he had mental health issues. She strikes up an instant rapport with Sonia, however, later inviting her back to her house without Alan. On hearing that the Colmans' family motto is "Too much mustard gets up your nose," Alan tries desperately to impress her by eating a big spoonful of mustard. However, an unimpressed Karen has put this down to Alan's previously declared "mental health", leaving him further humiliated.

Alan plans a Bond-athon (watching all the Bond films in sequential order) for the bank holiday weekend with Michael. Lynn reveals to Alan that she has a new friend, Gordon, an ex-policeman who threatens Alan for mistreating Lynn at times. The Bond weekend all goes pear-shaped when Lynn accidentally destroys his Bond movies after spilling Sunny Delight over them. Alan is about to give her the full force of his anger when Gordon stands up next to her: Alan panics, backs down and decides to take his anger out on his breakfast cereals instead. When he discovers that Michael has another friend, Tex (Peter Serafinowicz), he becomes jealous and falls out with Michael, un-inviting him to the Bond-athon. Alan targets John the builder for his new friend/protector-from-Gordon. After patching things up with Michael, Alan discovers that Tex has taped over the one undamaged Bond film with an episode of "America's Strongest Man."

The Inland Revenue are due to call and carry out a random investigation on Alan's business affairs, causing him to worry. The Inland Revenue people arrive earlier than the set time, catching Alan dancing around (playing air bass) in his caravan to Gary Numan's "Music for Chameleons". During the investigation, Alan offers the two "inspectresses" a beer (which they decline) and insists that they can't have any "Mini Babybels" as they are for the car when he's driving to Harrogate. Alan makes a fool out of himself several more times, including trying to walk like R2-D2, raising his legs, and "accidentally on purpose" breaking wind (claiming it was "mostly deliberate") right next to the Inland Revenue people. This leads to him having a minor argument with Sonia, which is all seen by the tax people. In order to make things up to her, he takes her to Bono's house (really Blickling Hall), after falsely claiming to be a personal friend of his. Lynn also gets a friend of hers from the Baptist Church to pretend to be Bono, even giving him her mother's cataract glasses to wear in hope that Sonia would be convinced he is Bono.

The building work on Alan's house is finally complete and Sonia is angling to cohabit. Alan however, has other ideas and tries to "come to some arrangement" with her. He is interviewed on a radio show called Prayer Wave, where his insensitive comments result in one of the guests (Julia Davis) walking out. After this, he attends Lynn's baptism at her church where he simulates blowing his head off with a shotgun and assaults one of the guests (Rob Brydon) who questions Alan's anecdote-writing ability.