The Secret War of Lisa Simpson

After a day watching mind-numbing videos in class, Lisa worries that her education is not challenging enough. Bart's class goes on a field trip to the Springfield Police Department, where Bart finds a room with several megaphones. He places them end-to-end, increasing their amplification and creating a sonic shockwave that shatters all the glass in Springfield. Chief Wiggum suggests sending Bart to military school to correct his behavior. Under the ruse they are going to Disneyland, Homer and Marge drive the kids to Rommelwood Military School; while there, Lisa decides she also wants to enroll. Homer and Marge reluctantly agree and ignore Bart's protests that he wants to go home.

Lisa stirs discontent among the students because she is the first female student and gets her own barracks. After she and Bart endure hazing, Bart is eventually accepted by the other cadets and distances himself from his sister. Lonely, Lisa considers going home, but decides to see it through. As the school year comes to a close, the Commandant reveals the final test for the students: the "Eliminator", a hand-over-hand crawl across a rope suspended high above thorn bushes. Lisa fears she will not be able to complete the task, but Bart helps her train in secret.

On the day of the test, Lisa is the last to cross the Eliminator. She is about to fall as the students jeer, but Bart cheers her on and she makes it across safely. The other students vow to make the rest of the semester a living hell for Bart, but realize that they graduate in only three hours. The Commandant awards Lisa a special medal "For Satisfactory Completion of the Second Grade". After the ceremony, Homer and Marge tell the kids they will visit Disneyland "for real" this time, but instead drive them to a dentist's office.

Richard Appel wrote the episode.

The episode was written by Richard Appel, but the idea of Bart and Lisa attending a military academy had previously been pitched, and had been floating around since 1991.[3] The idea had not yet been used as an episode plot, because the writers had not felt comfortable with taking Bart and Lisa to a strange place early in the series.

During the scene where the Commandant is talking, there is a brief shot of Lisa blinking. As there had been an error in the final print of the episode, the shot was animated, painted and shot on May 16, 1997, the Friday before the episode's airdate.[4] The spiky blond-haired boy, who runs towards the Eliminator while screaming, is a caricature of director Mike B. Anderson.[4]

The episode originally aired on May 18, 1997, as the season finale, along with a rerun of "The Springfield Files."[5] The episode was mistakenly anticipated by some as being about Lisa launching "a legal battle" to enroll at the military school.[5] In its original broadcast, "The Secret War of Lisa Simpson" finished 47th in ratings for the week of May 12–18, 1997, with a Nielsen rating of 8.3, equivalent to approximately 8.1 million viewing households. It was the second highest-rated show on the Fox network that week, following The X-Files.[6]

Warren Martyn and Adrian Wood, the authors of the book I Can't Believe It's a Bigger and Better Updated Unofficial Simpsons Guide, disliked the episode, writing that it was "very dull" and that Dafoe was not used well.[1] However, Dafoe is one of show runner Josh Weinstein's favorite guest stars.[3] Ian Johnson argued Dafoe's casting was "rare" and "somewhat offbeat".[7]

Journalist Raju Mudhar also wrote that in this episode, "The Simpsons have succinctly laid out our eventual future." This referred to the rise of robots in the real world and the quote from this episode:

"The wars of the future will not be fought on the battlefield or at sea. They will be fought in space, or possibly on top of a very tall mountain. In either case, most of the actual fighting will be done by small robots. And as you go forth today remember always your duty is clear: To build and maintain those robots."[8]

The episode was one of four in 1999 released on a VHS (Re-released on DVD in 2005) called Bart Wars focused on crosses between The Simpsons and Star Wars. However, one critic wrote that with this episode and "Marge Be Not Proud" and "Dog of Death," both of which are also on the DVD, the "Star Wars connection" is "tangential at best."[9]

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• "The Secret War of Lisa Simpson" at The Simpsons.com
• "The Secret War of Lisa Simpson episode capsule". The Simpsons Archive.
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• The Secret War of Lisa Simpson on IMDb