1981–82 Port Vale F.C. season

The pre-season saw John McGrath make four new signings: defender Ray Deakin (Everton); midfielder Geoff Hunter (from Crewe Alexandra for £12,000); and forwards Ernie Moss (from Chesterfield for £12,000) and Jimmy Greenhoff (Toronto Blizzard).[1] Attempts to re-sign Brian Horton failed. On 1 August, a heavy metal concert was held at Vale Park, headlined by local lad Lemmy's Motörhead.[1] Some twenty thousand metal fans paid £7.50 admission each to boost club coffers.[1] However Vale failed to win any of their pre-season friendlies, and in fact were embarrassed to lose 6–1 at home to local rivals Stoke City.[1]

The season opened with four draws, somewhat ironic considering that McGrath had stated that 'forwards are much more important now' after the Football League changed a win from earning two points to three points.[1] On 12 September, their club-record run of six consecutive draws came to an end. Four victories in five games then put Vale into seventh place, and Colin Tartt was signed from Chesterfield for £15,000.[1] A 2–0 home defeat to Sheffield United in front of the television cameras was the first of a run of four defeats in five games, and sent an injury-hit Vale down into mid-table.[1] In November, Lee Harwood was forced to retire with a knee injury.[1] Vale then went on a fifteen match unbeaten run in the league, and between 20 January and 6 March the team went on a club-record six consecutive home draws.[1] Stoke City offered £100,000 plus incentives for Mark Chamberlain, but Chairman Don Ratcliffe called the offer 'an insult' and rejected it out of hand.[1] Instead Tony Sealy arrived on loan, this time from Queens Park Rangers.[1] On 6 February Mark Chamberlain scored a memorable goal at Field Mill when he stood off the pitch to avoid being caught offside, then returned to tackle a startled Rod Arnold and tap the ball into an empty net.[1] Mansfield Town manager Stuart Boam was so enraged that the goal stood that he raced onto the pitch to verbally abuse the linesman.[1] In March, Johnny Miller had to retire with a knee injury.[1] On 20 March, Mark Harrison conceded 'a crazy goal' from Hull City left-back Dennis Booth at Boothferry Park, whose fifty yard free kick hit the back of the net after several bounces.[1] Injuries hit the Vale squad and the promotion campaign faded away.[1] On 1 May, Vale Park witnessed its lowest ever Football League attendance when a mere 1,924 turned up against York City.[1]

They finished in seventh place with seventy points, eighteen short of fourth-placed Bournemouth.[1] With nine away victories and twelve home draws, McGrath stated that "we blew it at Burslem".[1] Ernie Moss was the Player of the Year and top-scorer with seventeen goals, however it was Mark Chamberlain who was selected in the PFA Fourth Division team and received a cheque for £250 when he was chosen as The Star's best player of the division.[1]

On the financial side, a loss of £65,000 was announced, despite donations of £136,070.[1] The overdraft stood at £235,452.[1] Good news was that the club lottery had raised £750,000 in less than five years.[1] McGrath released eight players and retained eleven.[1] The club's first ever shirt sponsors were NGR Copiers. Those departing included: Peter Farrell and Gerry Keenan (Rochdale); Paul Bowles (Stockport County); Trevor Brissett (Darlington); Andy Higgins (Hartlepool United); and Ray Deakin (Burnley).[1]

In the FA Cup, Vale drew with Third Division Lincoln City at Sincil Bank and again in Burslem, and so had to play a second replay, which they won 2–0.[1] Their clash with Stockport County was postponed seven times due to snow and fog, before the "Valiants" finally recorded a 4–1 victory on 2 January.[1] Facing Second Division Shrewsbury Town in the Third Round, they lost by the odd goal at Gay Meadow, the "Shrews" scoring with the last kick of the match.[1]

In the League Cup, a 1–1 draw at Edgar Street was followed by a 2–0 home win to knock Hereford United out 3–1 on aggregate.[1] In the Second Round for the first time since 1972, they lost to Tranmere Rovers both at Prenton Park and Vale Park to exit the competition 4–1 on aggregate.[1]