The Way Back

Blake: There can be no justification for deliberate murder.

Judge: The accused has been found guilty on all charges. His crimes have been accorded a category nine rating and as such are judged most grave. In sentencing you, the judgement machine has taken into account your past record; your service to the state and your loyalty to The Federation. None of these has mitigated in your favour. It is the sentence of this tribunal that you be taken from this place to an area of close confinement. From there you will be transported to the penal colony on the planet Cygnus Alpha where you will remain for the rest of your natural life.

Vila: Easy! Take it easy! I hate personal violence, especially when I'm the person.

Vila: You're on your way to the penal colony on Cygnus Alpha. Or you will be when the prison ship's refueled. Try to look on the bright side: It must have something; none of the guests have ever left early... In fact none of them have ever left at all.

Blake: Why are you going there?

Vila: They didn't give me a choice. [Pause] I steal things. compulsive, I'm afraid. I've had my head adjusted by some of the best in the business. But it just won't stay adjusted.

Blake: A professional thief?

Vila: More a vocation than a profession; other people's property just comes naturally to me.

Space Fall

Blake: No, not until free men can think and speak. Not until power is back with the honest man.

Avon: Have you ever met an honest man?

Avon: Listen to me. Wealth is the only reality. And the only way to obtain wealth is to take it away from somebody else. Wake up, Blake! You may not be tranquilised any longer, but you're still dreaming.

Vila: Nervous? I'm not nervous. Just... poised for action, that's all.

Blake: What went wrong?

Avon: I relied on other people.

(regarding a hypothetical betrayal by Avon)

Jenna: He fixes the log, the crew dump us, pocket the profit, and set him free.

Vila: That's immoral. The cold-hearted murdering -- let's kill him now before he can do it.

Blake: If you had access to the computer, could you open the doors?

Avon: Of course. Why?

Blake: Just wondered how good you really were.

Avon: Don't try to manipulate me, Blake.

Vila: No, I can't go in there, I've got a condition - a fear of enclosed spaces. There's a name for it...

Jenna: Cowardice?

Jenna: How do you feel?

Blake: Sick.

Avon: So you should. What a fiasco. You could take over the ship, you said, if I did my bit. Well, I did my bit, and what happened? Your troops bumble around looking for someone to surrender to, and when they've succeded, you follow suit.

Cpt. Leyland: I hope Mr Raiker's made it clear to you that you can refuse to do this.

Blake: Oh yes, he's also made it clear that summary execution is one of our options. We chose the other.

Cygnus Alpha

Avon asks Zen about the Teleport system:

Zen: Wisdom must be gathered, not given.

Avon: Don't philosophise at me, you electronic moron!

Blake: [Picks up one of Liberator's side-arms] Hand gun?

Avon: It's a bit elaborate for a tooth pick.

Blake: Depends how elaborate their teeth were.

Vila: [The prisoners have been dumped on Cygnus Alpha] This is nice, isn't it. What a miserable hole. If we all complained do you think they'd give us a refund?

Jenna: You wouldn't be trying to get rid of me, would you?

Avon: I have to get rid of Blake first. You're next on my list.

Jenna: That would have been very disarming, if I didn't know that you meant it.

Avon: (about Blake) He's a crusader. He'll look upon all this as just one more weapon to use against the Federation. And he can't win. You know he can't win. What do you want to be, rich or dead?

Time Squad

Blake: Seven of us can run this ship properly.

Vila: Six, surely.

Blake: You forgot Zen.

Avon: You're not counting that machine as a member of the crew.

Blake: Oh, what do you say to that, Zen?

Zen: Please state course and speed.

Blake: Very diplomatic. Set a course for Centero, speed standard by two.

Zen: Confirmed.

Vila: So much for Federation pursuit ships.

Gan: At least we know we can outrun them.

Vila: Outrun them? In this we can out stroll them!

Blake: Except that we're not going to hide. Very soon now the Federation ships will know exactly where we are. Or at least where we've been.

Vila: I don't follow you.

Avon: Oh, but you do. And that's the problem.

The Web

Avon saves Blake from an explosion:

Blake: Thank you... why?

Avon: Automatic reaction, I'm as surprised as you are.

Blake: I'm not surprised.

Avon: I'll tell you a fact of life, Blake! Change is inevitable!

Blake: Why else do we fight, Avon?

Seek-Locate-Destroy

Blake: [Over communicator to Liberator] I'm down and safe. I'm somewhere inside the main complex. Is Vila ready?

Jenna: [Over communicator] Hold on, just checking. [To Vila] Are you ready?

Vila: Tell him I've just worked out a completely new strategy. It's called Running away.

Jenna: [Over communicator] He's ready.

Vila: There isn't a lock I can't open... if I'm scared enough.

Blake: Are you scared enough for that one?

Vila: What do you think?

Cally: They're taking too long.

Avon: That's the trouble with heroics, they seldom run to schedule.

Jenna: They'll find it. There's not going to be a sign up there saying This way to the cipher room.

Gan: They may need help.

Cally: I think so too.

Avon: They would have called in.

Jenna: Avon's right.

Avon: I usually am.

Vila: Hello there. How are you? Excuse me wandering about your premises but I wonder if you can help me. I'm an escaped prisoner. I was a thief but recently I've become interested in sabotage, in a small way you understand, nothing too ambitious, I hate vulgarity, don't you? Anyway, I've come to blow something up. What do you think will be most suitable?

Blake: You don't matter enough to kill, Travis.

Doctor: She's not yet well enough to submit to intensive questioning. She must have rest.

Travis: Yes, thank you very much indeed, Doctor, you are relieved of your responsibility for the prisoner. She is now the property ... the concern of the interrogation division.

Mission to Destiny

Avon: [Over communicator] Are you Awake?

Vila: No.

Avon: That's what I thought. It's very quiet here. If it should get noisy, I'll be in touch.

Avon: It is frequently easier to trust those who have nothing to lose.

Cally: Blake will return...

Avon: You can bet your life on it. In fact, you've just bet both our lives on it.

Cally: My people have a saying: A man who trusts can never be betrayed, only mistaken.

Avon: Life expectancy must be fairly short among your people.

Blake: You're quite sure about volunteering to stay?

Cally: Well, we must help these people.

Avon: Must we? Personally I don't care if their whole planet turns into a mushroom. I shall stay because I don't like an unsolved mystery.

Avon: There's something else that has to happen before it all begins to come together.

Vila: Where are Cally and Avon?

Blake: It's a long story.

Vila: Well, what's in the box?

Blake: That's an even longer story.

Vila: I like stories.

Cally: I thought you mistrusted instinct?

Avon: I do. So I am probably wrong.

Duel

Blake: I get the distinct feeling I offended Zen's professional pride.

Avon: It's just a machine, Blake.

Vila: And he should know.

Gan: Well, Avon is the expert.

Vila: That's not what I meant.

Avon: No. He was calling me a machine. But since he undoubtedly defines himself as a human being, I shall choose to take that as more of a compliment than anything else.

Blake: on Travis: How do you demonstrate the death of a friend to a man who hasn't got any?

Blake: Have you got any better ideas?

Avon: As a matter of fact, no, I haven't.

Blake: Does that mean you agree?

Avon: Do I have a choice?

Blake: Yes.

Avon: Then I agree.

Vila: Have you thought of another plan?

Avon: Yes. I'm going to get some sleep.

Vila: How can you sleep with all this happening?

Avon: With all what happening? Blake is sitting up in a tree, Travis is sitting up in another tree. Unless they're planning to throw nuts at one another, I don't see much of a fight developing before it gets light.

Gan: You're never involved, are you Avon? You ever cared for anyone?

Vila: Except yourself?

Avon: I have never understood why it should be necessary to become irrational in order to prove that you care, or, indeed, why it should be necessary to prove it at all. [Exits]

Vila: Was that an insult or did I miss something?

Cally: You missed something.

Avon: Logic says we're dead.

Blake: Logic has never defined what dead is.

Project Avalon

Blake: Avalon has started resistance movements in a dozen Federation planets.

Avon: Another idealist, poor but honest. I shall look forward to our meeting with eager anticipation.

Blake: Does it support any intelligent life?

Avon: Does The Liberator? [pause] There are creatures called "Subterrons". they live in caves, quite what that says for their intelligence I really wouldn't know.

Vila (having been volunteered to go down): Me? Oh, no, wait a minute, it's cold out there and I'm very susceptible to low temperatures. I've got a weak chest!

Avon: The rest of you's not very impressive.

Breakdown

Jenna: They don't like humanoids in general and in particular, homo sapiens.

Avon: That puts their intelligence beyond doubt.

Avon: I'm finished. Staying with you requires a degree of stupidity of which I no longer feel capable.

Blake: No, you're just being modest.

Jenna: Hello.

Renor: Hello, hello, hello!

Vila: Ah. Jenna, this is Professor Kayn's assistant, his name is -

Renor: Renor. And I had a feeling this was going to be a good day.

Jenna: Yes, well, don't let your feelings run away with you.

Renor: Oh, a sense of humor, too. I love girls with a sense of humor.

Jenna: Yes, I can see where that would be an advantage. This way, please.

Renor: Do you believe in love at first sight, Jenna?

Jenna: Not yet.

(XK-72 has been destroyed by pursuit ships)

Avon: Say goodbye to one bolthole.

Blake: That wasn't funny, Avon.

Avon: It wasn't meant to be.

Bounty

Vila: I'm entitled to my opinion.

Avon: It is your assumption that we are entitled to it as well that is irritating.

Vila: I don't want data, I want to know what's happening.

Zen: It will be necessary for you to make a personal investigation.

Vila: Oh, you're a big help. Personal investigation... Personal investigation... The next time Avon wants to make a personal investigation on how you work I shall make a personal point of handing him the instruments. Personally.

Avon: First sign of trouble, we get out, right?

Jenna: Goes without saying.

Avon: I only wish it did.

(Vila fails to remove an explosive collar from Blake's neck)

Vila: I told you I couldn't do it!

Avon: I believed you all along.

Vila: Nobody can open it!

Avon: I thought you could open anything - that's always been one of your more modest claims.

Jenna: It could be an injured pilot.

Avon: It could be a trap.

Gan: It's not a very good one, then. We're suspicious of it already.

Avon: The test is not whether you are suspicious but whether you are caught.

Avon: None of us showed conspicuous intelligence on this occasion.

Deliverance

Vila: [To Avon] Including yourself, that's two people who think you're wonderful.

Vila: You're enjoying this, aren't you?

Avon: Probably.

Cally: Did she really think you were a god?

Avon: For a while.

Blake: How did it feel?

Avon: Don't you know?

Blake: Yes. I don't like the responsibility either.

Orac

Vila: Die? I can't do that!

Avon: I'm afraid you can. It's the one talent we all share, even you.

Orac: You are carrying weapons. You will remove them.

Blake: We'd prefer to keep them with us.

Orac: You will remove them!

Blake: No.

(Orac fires at the ground in front of them)

Blake: We will remove them.

Avon: Can you stand?

Vila: Why would I want to?

Avon: [Hands Vila a gunbelt] Put that on.

Vila: But I can barely stand.

Avon: Then crawl, but put that on!

Ensor: I disapprove of weapons.

Blake: So do I, but I disapprove of dying even more.

(Avon shoots Travis in the hand just as he is about to fire)

Blake: Good shot, Avon.

Avon: I was aiming for his head.

[The Crew activate Orac for the first time. He sounds like Ensor]

Blake: It's exactly as though Ensor were speaking.

Orac: Surely it is obvious even to the meanest intelligence that during my development I would naturally become endowed with aspects of my creator's personality.

Avon: The more endearing aspects by the sound of it.

Orac: Possibly. However similarities between myself and Ensor are entirely superficial. My mental capacity is infinitely greater.

Jenna: Modest, isn't he?

Orac: Modesty would be dishonesty.

Vila: What's wrong with being dishonest?

Orac: Is that a question?

Vila: Yes.

Orac: The question is futile. Were I to say that I am incapable of dishonesty how would you know if I was being dishonest or not?

Blake: A question for a question. Well, you're capable of evasion, anyway.

Vila: I think I've heard enough, I don't like him. Orac, be a good junk heap; shut up.

Redemption

Blake: Avon - concentrate on Zen. Give priority to the detectors and the navigation systems. And then see if you can get us some scans.

Avon: Is that all? What shall I do with the other hand?

Blake: I'll let you know.

Vila: When you get Zen working, ask him to prescribe something for a headache, will you? I've got this shocking pain right behind the eyes.

Avon: Have you considered amputation?

Vila: If it ever comes to a showdown, my money's on Blake. Well, half of it. I'll put the other half on Avon.

Jenna: Perhaps we could chew our way out.

Jenna: What happened to your head?

Vila: One of the guards didn't like me.

Shadow

Vila: Stop worrying, Cally, I'll be back soon. Tell you what, I'll bring you back a present! What would you like, Cally? Name it, and it's yours...

Cally: A necklace, Vila. Made from your teeth.

Largo: They're beautiful stones. I'm a bit of a collector, in a modest way. I could make you an offer.

Avon: They have a sentimental value for me.

Largo: Oh, family heirlooms, eh?

Avon: No, I'm just sentimental about money.

(An enforcer points a gun at Avon and Gan)

Enforcer: You two, out.

Avon: Why?

Enforcer: You'd prefer not to know.

Avon: Your professional simplicity is beginning to irritate me.

Central Control (on Cally): There's a lunatic woman threatening to destroy the city!

Gan: I can't find Orac. Even tried calling his name.

Avon: Oh, I'm sorry I missed that. It's the kind of natural stupidity no amount of training could ever hope to match.

Blake: We chose the wrong approach, that's all.

Gan: Is that all? I thought maybe we'd chosen the wrong people to get involved with.

Avon: "We chose the wrong approach"?

Blake: I chose the wrong approach. Does it matter?

Avon: Yes, it does.

Blake: All right, Avon. You were right and I was wrong. You said persuasion wouldn't work and it didn't. So now we use force.

Avon: Force? Yes, of course. Law makers, law breakers, let us fight them all. Why not?

Jenna: It's enough to fry your eyeballs.

Avon: …daintily put.

Jenna: Must be the company I keep.

Avon: It could have been frying eyeballs you heard.

Jenna: …daintily put.

Avon: Ironic, isn't it? We were hoping to use the Terra Nostra to attack the Federation, only to discover that it is already being used to support it.

Vila: Where are all the good guys?

Blake: Could be looking at them.

Avon: What a very depressing thought.

Weapon

Avon: Auron may be different, Cally, but on Earth it is considered ill-mannered to kill your friends while committing suicide.

Cally: Sooner or later, Blake is going to attack Federation Central Control on Earth itself.

Vila: Later. Much later.

Avon: And alone, probably.

Jenna: I doubt that.

Gan: He wouldn't be alone if you just left him, Avon.

Avon: You would stay with him?

Gan: Yes.

Avon (smirks): Virtually alone, then.

Avon: It is a triple-A security installation.

Vila: We have got into those before.

Avon: Usually with your screams of protest ringing in our ears. Are you telling me you're in favour of this idea?

Vila: No! Not exactly...I just don't think it's stupid. Perhaps...maybe I'm on your side, Cally.

Blake: It's not a question of sides, Vila.

Avon (to Vila): No, it's a question of intelligence. So your opinion has very little relevance.

Jenna: Maybe IMIPAK is another Orac. If we captured it, perhaps we could breed from them.

Blake: Zen's best guess is that he's… here. Offers?

Gan: Well, let's go and get him.

Avon: Gung ho?

Avon: We do not know what IMIPAK is.

Blake: Exactly. The least we've got to do is find out what it does.

Vila: Why have we? I can live without it.

Blake: It's just conceivable that you can't.

Avon: Unless of course you want your last words to be, "So that's IMIPAK."

Carnell: [Talking to a Federation Trooper] Remember, the officer corps can forgive anything they understand. Which makes Intelligence just about the only sin.

Horizon

Cally: You're not going to follow the freighter all the way to Horizon?

Blake: Why not? I'm curious.

Avon: Oh, you are curious. Well, I'm glad we have a worthwhile purpose.

Blake: Doesn't it interest you a little?

Avon: No! There's nothing out there - we are on the edge. Even Zen has nothing on it. That could mean anything - an experimental warzone - anything.

Blake: That freighter's gone to Horizon for some good reason.

Avon: Which is more than you can say for us.

Vila: Why don't you go?

Avon: You are expendable.

Vila: And you're not?

Avon: No, I am not. I am not expendable, I'm not stupid, and I'm not going.

Ro: I rule this planet.

Blake: Do you? I thought it was a Federation colony.

Ro: I dislike the word "colony."

Blake: Which word would you prefer?

Ro: I rule here, and you're my prisoners.

Blake: I dislike the word "prisoner."

Avon: If I go alone, can I pilot the Liberator independently?

Orac: With the help of the automatics, of course you can.

Avon: I know that.

Orac: Then why did you ask the question?

Avon: I didn't. How long can I maintain myself?

Orac: Is that a question?

Avon: Yes.

Orac: We have concentrated food for one person for a thousand years.

Avon: And our power is self-regenerating.

Orac: Affirmative.

Avon: Can you plot courses to keep out of the range of any known spaceship manned by the Federation?

Orac: The battle and navigation computers can handle that perfectly adequately.

Avon: I asked if you could.

Orac: Of course, should it be necessary.

Avon: Failing that, we are powerful enough to resist all but an attack by three Federation pursuit ships at once.

Orac: Is that a question?

Avon: No. If we go now, we can sail the universe for as long as we like in reasonable safety, provided we keep out of everybody's way and we do not do anything rash.

Orac: No data available to answer the question. [Beat] If it was a question.

Avon: I put it to you as a possibility. I request the odds.

Orac: The odds would be three point five to one on survival.

Avon: Therefore I do not need Blake, I do not need any of the others...

Orac: Is that a question?

Avon: I do not need anybody at all.

Orac: Is that a question? I - I - I must ask you to be more specific!

Avon: [snaps out of his thoughts] Shut up, Orac.

Avon: Orac, have you obtained any further information on the planet Horizon?

Orac: No.

Avon: Why not?

Orac: Is that a serious question?

Avon: No.

Orac: Please do not waste my time.

Pressure Point

Blake: It's time we really hurt the Federation. Oh, we've been hitting at the fingers, the arms. I want to hit at the heart. And the heart of the Federation is Earth.

Jenna: Where, exactly, or do you plan to take the whole planet?

(Avon has just agreed to join Blake on his suicidal mission)

Blake: Do you want to tell me why?

Avon: I like the challenge.

Blake: You don't want to tell me why.

Avon: If we succeed, if we destroy control, the Federation will be at it's weakest. It will be more vulnerable than it has been for centuries. The revolt in the outer worlds will grow. Resistance movements on Earth will launch an all-out attack to destroy The Federation, they will need unifying; they will need a leader. You will be the natural choice.

Blake: Possibly.

Avon: Don't be modest, Blake, you are the only one that they would all follow. You would have no choice; you would have to stay on Earth and organise the revolt.

Blake: If there's no other way.

Avon: There wouldn't be.

Blake: That still doesn't explain why you're backing me.

Avon: With you running the campaign on Earth, somebody has to take charge of all this.

Blake: [Laughing] You want The Liberator?

Avon: Exactly. If we succeed, the destruction of control gives us both what we want.

Blake: Could be you're planning just a little far ahead.

Avon: Perhaps.

Blake: [Via Communicator] Liberator, we're at the rendezvous point, everything's all right.

Avon: You have made contact with Kasabi?

Blake: Not yet. Not directly.

Avon: Then everything is not 'all right.'

Blake: It will be, I'll get back to you.

Avon: [To Vila] Do you get the feeling there's something he's not telling us?

Jenna: I dunno. I hate waiting like this.

Vila: It could be worse; we could be down there with them.

Cally: I'd prefer that to being here.

Vila: You're welcome to take my place when the time comes.

Avon: If it comes.

Cally: What do you mean?

Avon: Something's not right.

Vila: He's failed to make contact with Kasabi.

Avon: Exactly. But Kasabi's signal came from the rendezvous point. Blake has arrived there and failed to make contact.

Jenna: That doesn't necessarily mean anything disastrous. Perhaps they're just being extra careful

Avon: Let's hope so. Because I have a feeling that we are not being careful enough.

Vila: I don't want to go.

Avon: You surprise me.

Vila: I don't feel well. I'm going to be a big handicap.

Avon: I'm used to that.

Gan: Blake, we're going to have to pull out.

Blake: It's a setback, but we've come this far. It means a change of plan but I'd still like to try for it.

Gan: What's the use?! The risks are doubled now.

Blake: I'm not so sure. Kasabi was only giving us back-up cover; holding off the security forces to give us time to penetrate The Forbidden Zone.

Gan: Yes, so how can we hope to do it without her?

Blake: We still have the element of surprise! Even more so. With Kasabi's force wiped out, Security aren't going to expect another assault so soon.

Gan:You're guessing, Blake! Guessing and hoping.

Servalan: Are you beginning to have doubts, Travis?

Travis: No. It won't fail.

Servalan: I hope not, there will be no second chances.

Travis: I won't need them, it's running my way now. The luck has changed. It's my turn!

Servalan: Capturing the girl is the only luck you've had so far.

Travis: That single event has given me total control of the situation.

Travis: With no Teleport to snatch them away, they're mine.

Travis: They'll dig us out eventually.

Servalan: Oh yes. They'll dig us out eventually. And then I'll bury you.

Trial

Vila:[Talk about Gan] He was straightforward, wasn't always expecting to be cheated and double-crossed -- not like us. He trusted people -- he trusted Blake completely.

Jenna: Much good it did him.

Avon: Welcome back to reality, Jenna.

Avon: Which only leaves one question to be answered. Is it that Blake has a genius for leadership, or merely that you have a genius for being led?

Vila: I see. So you've decided to be led like the rest of us?

Avon: I shall continue to follow. It's not quite the same thing.

Vila: I don't see the difference.

Avon: Well, I didn't really think that you would.

Jenna: Do you want to tell me why you've left most of the southern hemisphere off the search pattern?

Avon: I don't believe that Blake can think and swim at the same time. It's nothing but ocean down there.

Avon: It's possible that one of your disciples... one of your three remaining disciples may come after you.

Blake: Then you'll have to talk them out of it. They may even listen to you this time.

Avon: Why not? After all, I don't get them killed.

[Pause]

Blake: [Quietly, to Avon] True.

Avon: One of these days they are going to leave you. They were almost ready to do so this time.

Blake: Yes, I thought they might be.

Avon: You handle them very skilfully.

Blake: Do I?

Avon: But one more death will do it.

Blake: Then you'd better be very careful. It would be ironic if it were yours.

Vila: They missed us! Avon's gadget works!

Blake: I never doubted it for a moment. (Avon frowns.) Is something wrong?

Avon: It just occurred to me that, as the description of a highly sophisticated technological achievement, "Avon's gadget works" seems to lack a certain style.

Avon (To Blake): I would quite like to have met this Zil of yours. It's not often that one comes across a philosophical flea.

Vila: That's the stuff that legends are made of!

Avon: …then again, perhaps they are not so uncommon.

Killer

Vila: I hope you can trust him.

Avon: I told you, he's a friend of mine.

Vila: Yes, I always knew you had a friend. I used to say to people, "I bet Avon's got a friend...somewhere in the galaxy."

Avon: And you were right. That must be a novel experience for you.

Vila: When Avon holds out the hand of friendship, watch his other hand. That's the one with the hammer.

Avon: Vila?

Vila: What?

Avon: You're a fool.

Vila: Nerves getting to you?

Avon: There are a quarter of a million volts running through that converter. I make one false move, I'll be so crisped up what's left of me won't fit into a sandwich.

Vila: I'm a vegetarian. Thanks for the offer, though.

Vila: You don't have a lot of time for Blake, do you?

Avon: I could never stand heroes.

Vila: A quarter of a million volts and you're putting your hand in?

Avon: Ah, but that is self-interest. We need that crystal. Blake takes risks to help other people. Sometimes people he doesn't even know. One day that great big bleeding heart of his will get us all killed.

Vila: Unless somebody ditches him first.

Tynus: By the way, why don't our detectors pick up the Liberator?

Vila: Anti-detection screen, one of Avon's gadgets. We're expecting it to break down any time.

Hostage

(Talking about Avon's detector shield.)

Blake: Looks like the Federation have developed a shield themselves.

Cally: Yes, well, they got very, very close before we saw them.

Avon: That is the most depressing aspect of the whole affair. I was rather hoping to sell them the idea.

Councilor Joban: The council ask 'where is Blake's head?' And we have no answer.

Servalan: You shall have it.

Councilor Joban: The answer, or his head?

Servalan: Both.

Servalan: Estimated time to Exbar?

Mutoid: Planetfall will be at twenty one fifty nine standard.

Servalan: Are we at full capacity?

Mutoid: We are calculating at time distort nine. That is our safety maximum.

Servalan: I thought this ship was capable of time distort ten?

Mutoid: That is the emergency maximum.

Servalan: This is emergency, time distort ten.

Mutoid: Yes, Supreme Commander. Time distort ten.

Servalan: Mutoids. Don't you ever question anything?

Mutoid: This is not our function. Our function is to obey without question. Computer reports message from Counsellor Joban.

Servalan: Ignore it.

Mutoid: It is from headquarters Supreme Commander.

Servalan: I said, ignore it.

Mutoid: It is directed to this ship.

Servalan: Is it directed to you?

Mutoid: No.

Servalan: To whom is it directed?

Mutoid: To you.

Servalan: And I said ignore it. Understood?

Mutoid: Understood.

Jenna: Where are you going?

Cally: I'm going to clear the neutron blasters for firing.

Jenna: Well, what are you going to fire at?

Cally: Anything that moves.

Vila: What have I done to deserve this?

Avon: How long a list would you like?

Servalan: There's no one as free as a dead man.

Countdown

Avon: It would be stupid to be shot up by our own allies.

Vila: Not only stupid, painful.

Avon: If there had ever been a time when I could have given my own life to save her, I would have done it. The only grain of consolation that I have ...is that Anna knew that.

Voice From The Past

Avon: Predictably barren.

Jenna: Wretched mining companies. No sense of aesthetics.

Avon: What d'you want them to do, landscape?

Jenna: Weeell, they could make an effort.

Servalan: Where there's life, there's threat

Blake: For once just try trusting me. [Leaves]

Cally: What is this priority of his?

Avon: Exactly. He's used a number of ploys to get his own way, but "Just try trusting me"? That's weak even by his standards

Cally: So what is wrong?

Orac: You deduced it yourself earlier. Space Command has long tried to perfect a course interceptor attuned to the circuitry of navigational computers and rational coordinators like Zen. The scientists on Auron, however, had the wit to aim for the weaker point.

Avon: The human brain.

Orac: Correct.

Cally: A telepathic order was beamed to Blake to force him reroute to that asteroid?

Orac: As you, yourself, foresaw.

Avon: So tell us something new.

Orac: It is to Blake that you should look for the new.

Avon: What's that supposed to mean? That they are still influencing him?

Orac: Correct again.

Avon: But how? A device of that kind would need an enormous power source.

Orac: Agreed. But now that they...

Avon: [Interrupting] Now that they are close at hand, low power; of course.

Cally: What do we do?

Avon: Locate and destroy it.

Orac: And restore Blake to his senses.

Avon: The two don't necessarily follow.

Glynn: Be careful not to tamper with it. At this close range it could cause serious damage to your computers.

Avon: Is that correct Orac?

Orac: No. Negative. Denied. Incapable of damage.

Cally (to Blake): Are you all right?

Jenna: He's a hard man to rescue when he doesn't want to be rescued.

Avon: More to the point, are you yourself?

Blake: What happened? Why aren't we at Del 10? What's going on, Avon?

Avon: Why don't you just say thank you, nicely.

Blake: Well what are we all standing around for? Or has the Federation disappeared? Our problem is to find Star One, if you haven't forgotten. (Walks off.)

Avon: I am sorry to have to inform you… that he is himself, all right.

Gambit

Vila: They say it's wide open.

Avon: What is?

Vila: Freedom City.

Avon: So I've heard; Wide wide open.

Vila: Got everything a man ever dreams of, they say.

Avon: Space City pales by comparison, they say.

Vila: Y'know if it was a desert down there. So hot your eyeball frizzled, poisonous snakes under every rock.

Avon: Blake would've sent us.

Vila: You can bet on it.

Servalan: (about Krantor) He is a despicable animal. When the Federation finally cleans out this cesspit, I shall have that vulpine degenerate eviscerated with a small and very blunt knife.

The Keeper

Blake: He seems harmless.

Vila: He smells horrible.

Blake: Well, so would you if you'd been here for as long as he has.

Star One

Avon: I have been doing some calculations, if this is Star One...

Blake: If it is?

Avon: First, catch your computer, but all right, it probably is, and that being the case the choice of location is fascinating.

Blake: I'm glad you're enjoying it.

Avon: The nearest large galaxy to our own is Andromeda.

Blake: So?

Avon: So, this is the nearest point to Andromeda. If anyone could cross intergalactic space in less than a lifetime we are now precisely upon the route that they would take.

Blake: What are you trying to say, Avon?

Avon: I directed the detectors toward the Andromeda galaxy. There are thousands of satellite generators out there... beyond Star One.

Blake: What?

Avon: Even with the Federation's resources it must have taken them years.

Blake: [examining a readout] That must be the biggest antimatter minefield ever put together!

Vila: Minefield, what minefield?

Avon: Perhaps the intergalactic drive has been developed. The question is, by whom?

Blake: A defense zone to keep mankind in, or something else out.

Jenna: So it's a combined alarm system and minefield.

Orac: Correct. If I may continue.

Vila: He always makes me feel as if I should be taking notes.

Orac: [annoyed] If I may continue.

Vila: Then they are expecting an invasion? A hoard of hairy aliens!

Orac: There is no logical reason why aliens should be hairy.

Vila: There's no logical reason why people should be hairy!

Avon:As far as I'm concerned you can destroy whatever you like. You can stir up a thousand revolutions. You can wade in blood up to your armpits. Oh, and you can lead the rabble to victory -- whatever that may mean. Just so long as there's an end to it. When Star One is gone, it is finished, Blake. And I want it finished! I want it over and done with, I want to be free!

Cally: But you are free now, Avon.

Avon: [Bitterly, while glaring at Blake] I want to be free of him!

Travis: Put the gun down, Avon, it's too late to stop it now.

Avon: Convince me.

Travis: Be polite and I may let you live.

Avon: Be informative and I may let you die. You'll want that after I've shot off an arm and a leg or two.

Travis: I thought you were supposed to be the one with brains.

Avon: Brains but no heart. Now talk or scream, Travis, the choice is yours.

[They see an Andromedan for the first time]

Technician: What is it?

Avon: Unfriendly. Which is fortunate, they'd be difficult to love.

Alien: [believing he is talking to Travis] Why have you betrayed your own kind? Why have you given us the means to eradicate your species?

Blake: Eradicate Humanity?

Alien: Virtually.

Blake: [re-assuming Travis' arrogant persona] Well Maybe I just don't like crowds!

Travis: [When Travis is about to secretly let a horde of Aliens through a galactic defense shield to wipe out all of humanity] My one regret, is that they'll never know who really killed them...

Blake: [To Avon] For what it is worth, I have always trusted you. Right from the very beginning.

Vila: Avon, this is stupid!

Avon: When did that ever stop us?

Aftermath

Avon: Well, I hope she's not totally insane. Under the circumstances that could be a little bit embarrassing.

Zen: Damage control estimates that breakdown is now beyond the capacity of auto-repair systems in all areas. Serious malfunction in life-support would indicate that evacuation by life capsule is a priority one requirement.

Dayna: I Like the ancient weapons. The spear, the sword, the knife. They demand more skill. When you fight with them, conflict becomes more personal... More exciting.

Avon: More dangerous.

Dayna: Of course! Without danger, there's no pleasure.

Avon: That must limit your range of pleasures a bit.

Avon: I have had enough excitement for a while. Right now a little boredom wouldn't come amiss.

Servalan: [Pointing a gun at Avon's head from behind] Stay quite still.

Avon: Servalan.

Servalan: You don't sound surprised.

Avon: Why should I be? It has a perverse kind of logic to it. Our meeting is the most unlikely happening I could imagine; therefore, we meet. Surprise seems inappropriate somehow.

Hal Mellanby: You're not alone in losing your ship. The losses on both sides have been tremendous. I've been monitoring the status transmissions.

Kerr Avon: Did we win?

Hal: Sounds very confused, but there's not much doubt. The aliens were virtually wiped out.

Avon: Well the price was high enough. But at least we got what we paid for.

Hal: You almost didn't. It was a close run thing; what's left of the federation fleet, which isn't much, is scattered halfway across the galaxy. I'd say the Federation is in a lot of trouble.

Avon: Yes, it's difficult to sustain a military dictatorship when you've lost most of the military. [Hal laughs] I only hope Blake survived long enough to know that he was winning.... Both wars.

Hal: Blake? You were with Blake?

Avon: Yes. Though it hardly seems to matter now, if it ever did.

Hal: If it mattered? Blake and the Liberator. I've been hearing reports over the last couple of years. You were magnificent!

Avon: Not from where I was sitting.

[Discussing Dayna]

Hal: She has a genius with weaponry systems. And that's not just a father's pride talking.

Avon: And yet, with all this to choose from, she still goes around with a bow and arrows.

Hal: She takes absurd risks. I try to discourage her but I think she's trying to prove to herself that there's no weapon, ancient or modern, she cannot master.

Avon: I seldom comment on other people's ethics.

Servalan: I'm going to be honest with you.

Avon: That should be mildly disconcerting.

Avon: It's a great pity you and I have always been on opposite sides, Servalan.

Servalan: You have one other quality I admire. Very much.

Avon: Yes?

Servalan: You are infinitely corruptible. You'd sell out anybody, wouldn't you?

Avon: I don't know. I never really had an offer I felt was worthy of me.

Avon: Imagination our only limit? I'd be dead in a week.

Powerplay

Vila: It's not that I'm I coward or anything, it's just that I have a very low pain threshold. Hardly a threshold at all, actually.

Dayna: And once we're out?

Avon: This is my ship.

[Avon is trying to pick the lock to their cell]

Dayna: Do you want me to try it?

Avon: Are you any good with locks?

Dayna: No. But then neither are you by the look of it.

Avon: You should never judge by appearances.

Dayna: I don't. I judge by results, and you're not getting any.

Avon: Wrong again. [Opens the door]

(Avon and Dayna find a guard with a knife in his back)

Avon: That's a difficult way to commit suicide.

Dayna: Perhaps he was cleaning it and it went off.

Dayna: I'll come with you.

Avon: I can do it faster on my own.

Dayna: Do what? Avon, why do you keep everything to yourself? Why so secretive?

Avon: Perhaps I'm shy. (Goes to leave) Anybody comes through this door, kill them! (Pause; sardonic smile) Anybody that isn't me, that is.

Tarrant: Oh, don't blame yourself.

Avon: I'll try not to.

Tarrant: I imagine you've been under considerable stress.

Avon: I had hoped for a more inspiring epitaph.

Avon: That one is Cally; I shall introduce her more formally when she wakes up. This one is Vila; I should really introduce him now, he's at his best when he's unconscious.

Cally (to Vila): Given the choice, would you rather be a load of spare parts down there?

Avon: Or one spare part up here?

Volcano

Tarrant: It all seems quiet enough, Cally, if you don't count the volcano. I should let Orac take over. I think it's going to be some time before we find these friends of Dayna's.

Cally: All right, but keep in touch. Heroic rescues can be embarrassing if you're not actually in danger.

Cally: And what about Dayna? Don't you trust her either?

Vila: Dayna's a… different case entirely.

Cally: Well, she's pretty, for one thing.

Vila: Pretty? Yes, I suppose she is. I hadn't really noticed.

Avon: We've seen you not really noticing. Frequently.

Mori: I ask the questions. So, this is your magic computer, Orac, isn't it?

Orac: I assume your use of the word magic means that I am incomprehensible to you. While that may well be the case, your use of the word is inappropriate.

Mori: What?

Orac: Your use of the word magic is inappropriate. I am simply the sum of the thousands of data stores which are available to me.

(Vila and Cally are unable to contact Avon on the surface)

Vila: Communications blindspot… or maybe he landed in the volcano.

Cally: No, I think he's all right.

Vila: Yes, of course he's all right. There isn't a volcano alive that would dare to swallow Avon.

Cally: Vila, be quiet.

Vila: He's cold enough to put out the fire, anyway.

Dawn of the Gods

Tarrant: One day, Avon, I may have to kill you.

Avon (smiles): It has been tried.

Vila (Waking up with Avon looking down at him): I'm in Hell... and it's full of Avons.

Orac: Fascinating. Fascinating! A thousand years here would be too short.

Tarrant: [Holding up his index finger] Groff, what's that?

Groff: A finger?

Tarrant: A finger. And as you can see, it is better designed for pressing buttons than holding writing implements.

The Harvest of Kairos

Servalan: Jarvik? Of course. Jarvik. Jarvik, the construction worker. What was it now? Any fool could take the Liberator with three pursuit ships. Well, the Liberator will soon be diffusing itself throughout the galaxy as so many billion split particles. So, regrettably, we shall never know. Thanks to the folly of your president, who with her aides and her technical advisers, her battle computers and her captains, extravagantly disposed herself to use four pursuit ships. And yet any fool could have done it with three. Perhaps this particular fool will tell her how. (pause) Well? Have you nothing to say to Servalan?

Jarvik: Woman, you're beautiful. (grabs and kisses Servalan)

Servalan: Guards! Take this primitive to the punishment cells! Move!

Servalan: You say any fool could take The Liberator with three pursuit ships. Could you?

Jarvik: I could take her with one. But, as a man, Tarrant is worthy of honour. Three would not insult him.

Servalan: There's nothing to stop them now. The cream of my fleet, gone! Destroyed. And all you can do is smile as though you'd achieved something.

Jarvik: I have.

Servalan: What?

Jarvik: I made it look convincing.

Servalan: Oh, it was convincing all right. It convinced me. Three Mark Tens and fifteen years' supply of Kairopan.

Jarvik: You wanted the Liberator? If you're patient, you shall have her.

Servalan: And what will you take her with? A Kairopan shuttle? A transporter, perhaps? Or will you use your bare hands?! What are you doing?

Jarvik: (Picks up Servalan and dumps her on a couch) Lie there and keep quiet until I tell you otherwise.

Servalan: But first, there is the matter of that degrading and primitive act you subjected me to in the control room... I should like you to do it again.

Jarvik: But when was the last time you felt the warmth of the Earth's sun on your naked back? Or lifted your face to the heavens, and laughed with the joy of being alive? How long since you wept at the death of a friend? [Pause.] Doesn't mean a thing to you, does it, Madam President? You've surrounded yourself with machines and weapons, mindless men and heartless mutoids; and when they've done your work, and the machines have done your thinking, what is there left in you that feels?!

Servalan: So tell me, Zen, how does one operate this craft?

Zen: One manipulates the controls and the craft functions accordingly.

Avon: [Discussing Sopron] This happens to be the most sophisticated life form that it has ever been my good fortune to come across. Present company Not excepted.

Tarrant: Life? But it looks like...

Avon: A rock. Yes. Well, when you live on the permanent dark side of a planet nobody cares too much what you look like.

[The crew are approaching Liberator in an antiquated, unarmed, landing module]

Tarrant: Zen will have picked us up by now.

Avon: So?

Tarrant: So what do we do before they blow us out of the galaxy?

Avon: We Attack.

Tarrant: Attack? We have nothing to attack with.

Avon: Then bluff it. Tell them to surrender.

Tarrant: Is that a weapon?

Avon: That? No, no, it's purely defensive. An analogue of something that evolves on the permanent dark side of a planet. A highly simplified copy of course.

Tarrant: Permanent dark side? Are you saying you've...

Avon: I've built an artificial Sopron. Yes, that's what I'm saying.

[Zen informs Servalan that the module is marginally better equipped than Liberator]

Avon: Self defense. Some animals bristle out their fur to frighten their enemies. But that doesn't count for much in the dark.

Vila: So what does Sopron do?

Avon: Sopron is a mirror. A distorting mirror. It reflects a slightly greater image of whatever it is that happens to be scanning it. Zen saw a capacity-charged brain, because that is what Zen is. Orac saw a highly sophisticated computer because that is what Orac is. Cally thought that she saw her parents, But what she actually saw was herself.

Tarrant: And will that work?

Avon: Oh yes. The question is... what will Servalan see? And will she be fooled by it?

Vila: Are you sure you can dock this thing?

Tarrant: I hadn't really considered it.

Vila: What?

Tarrant: I thought we'd be dead by now.

City at the Edge of the World

Vila: All my life, for as long as I can remember, there's been people like you.

Tarrant: And I thought I was unique.

Vila: You're not even unusual, Tarrant.

Avon (on Vila): I don't know how you persuaded him to go, Tarrant.

Tarrant: I appealed to his better nature.

Avon: He hasn't got one. Leave him alone in future.

Tarrant: Or?

Avon: Do you want me to threaten you?

Tarrant: Why not. I haven't had a good laugh in ages.

Avon: Sensible. You could die laughing.

Cally (on Vila): He was terrified. So terrified he might just get himself killed, because it's easier than going on.

Tarrant: I'll take that risk.

Cally: It isn't yours to take.

Vila: I'll get you for this, Tarrant! I'll tear your arm off and beat you to death with the wet end! I'll get you for this!

Vila: Ah. Well, if you put it like that, of course I know who you are. You're -- you're, ah --

Bayban the Butcher: Bayban.

Vila: Bayban, yes.

Bayban the Butcher: Bayban the Beserker. Bayban the Butcher.

Vila: Bayban the Butcher . . . you're Bayban the Butcher! Oh, no.

Bayban the Butcher: That's better.

Vila: You're top of the Federation's Most Wanted list -- after Blake.

Bayban the Butcher: What do you mean, "after Blake"? I was working my way up that list before he crept out of his creche. WORKING my way up. I didn't take any political shortcuts.

Vila: I know, I know. You have a reputation for straightforward mayhem that's second to none. I've been an admirer of yours for, um, well, for as long as I can remember. Well maybe not that long, I mean, uh, you're not that old, are you? But, uh, then again, you did start very young, didn't you? I think I feel sick.

Bayban the Butcher: My mother [Sees the look on Vila's face] Oh yes, I had a mother; truly evil person. My mother used to say "Babe" -- she called me Babe -- "babe", she said, "Live every hour as though it were your last." I'll be back in an hour.

Avon: The point is that Vila won't trust you whereas he will trust Cally and me.

Tarrant: Cally yes, but why you?

Avon: Because he knows what I think about him.

Tarrant: You despise him.

Avon: Right. But at least I'm consistent about it.

Sherm: You've twenty-five minutes left.

Vila: Who told you that?

Sherm: Bayban:

Vila: I didn't think you could have worked it for yourself... Joke! Just a joke.

Vila: I don't believe in suicide, it stunts your growth!

Vila: [Sees a corpse decayed to a skeleton] Lost a lot of weight, hasn't he?

Avon: [Pointing his gun at Bayban] Bloodthirsty little maniac aren't you? Where's Vila?

Bayban: I don't know what you're talking about.

[Tarrant and Dayna enter]

Tarrant: Hello, Bayban. I heard a rumour you were dead. Funny that, seems to be true.

Bayban: Do I know you?

Tarrant: That's the trouble with celebrities. They never remember the little people.

Avon: Where is Vila?!

Bayban: Who?

Avon: How would you like me to let some fresh air into that rancid little brain of yours?

Bayban: Go ahead, you'll be famous, "The man who killed Bayban."

Cally: [Pointing her gun at Bayban] I'd quite like to be famous too. How about "The woman that killed Bayban"?

Dayna: [Pointing her gun at Bayban] Or better still, "The girl who killed Bayban"?

Kerril: If you think what happened in here gives you the right to treat me like some sort of...

Vila: Treat you like some sort of what? I haven't treated you like any sort of anything.

Cally: Vila, we thought we'd lost you!

Avon: …but every silver lining has a cloud.

Vila: I'd say you'd got that wrong, except I know you didn't.

Kerril: Are you coming with me?

Vila: I can't.

Kerril: Why not? It's a chance to be free, you saw that place, it's beautiful.

Vila: But there's nothing there worth stealing!

[Vila has left Kerril]

Vila: I think I've just made the biggest mistake of my life.

Orac: In the light of your previous record, that seems unlikely. I would predict that there are far greater mistakes waiting to be made by someone with your obvious talent for it.

Vila: Shut up, Orac. [Switched Orac Off] Still, it's a comforting thought. Let's hope they've all got good legs!

Children of Auron

Cally: Why Earth?

Tarrant: Why not?

Vila: The Himalayas are quite tall at this time of year.

Vila: And the Aurons punished you for your defiance, didn't they?

Tarrant: Were you exiled?

Cally: Yes. Why d'you imagine I've never gone back? (Looking at Avon) Affection for him?

Tarrant: Democracy. You're outvoted, Avon. Three to two.

Vila: Four to one. I like to stay with the winners whenever possible.

Avon: The trouble with the people of Auron is that they all suffer from a superiority complex.

Vila: You should get on with them then.

Avon: Too good to become involved with the rest of humanity.

Cally: That's not true. Just because we happen to be neutral...

Avon: [Interuppting] Neutrality or pacifism: it all boils down to the same gutless inanity.

Tarrant: This should snap her out of it.

Vila: That stuff would snap an asteroid out of orbit!

Avon: [Over communicator to Vila] Liberator? [No response] Idiot! Wake up!

Vila: They stand as much chance as a bubble in a black hole.

Rumours of Death

Shrinker: Why? I don't even ... I never saw him before. What have I ever done to him?

Dayna: You killed someone he loved.

Vila: And there aren't many of them about. Avon's not a very lovable man, in case you hadn't noticed.

Shrinker: Who was it?

(Tarrant, Dayna and Vila begin to circle Shrinker)

Tarrant: Did they give you names when they gave you your orders?

Dayna: And even if they did, could you put a face to the name? One screaming face among so many screaming faces?

Vila: Did they beg, Shrinker? Did they plead? No, Shrinker, please, Shrinker?

Tarrant: Can you remember how they cried, what they cried? Can you separate the voices now?

Dayna: Or is it just one long, satisfying scream?

Cally: Stop it! Stop it! All of you! Leave him alone.

Tarrant: He's an animal, Cally.

Cally: Yes, and it's contagious, isn't it?

Tarrant: Is it done?

Avon: Yes, but it isn't finished.

Vila: Wonderful. Who's next on your list? Servalan?

Avon: [Activates Orac] Orac.

Orac: [Annoyed] What is it now?

Avon: Gracious as ever. Orac, I want you to interrogate the Federation Security computers and get me Servalan's present location.

Vila: I was joking, Avon!

Avon: Do you know Orac's main drawback?

Dayna: He's too useful to destroy.

Avon: Irritating, isn't it?

Avon: Of all the things I am, I never recognized the fool.

Sarcophagus

Avon: Auron.

Cally: Yes, Auron. It's pointless to think about it. I'll never see it again.

Avon: That's why you've been shut in here for ten hours, thinking about Auron and how you'll never see it again?

Cally: That's why.

Avon: I wish I could promise you that the sparkling company on the flight deck would take you out of yourself.

Cally: I'm all right.

Avon: No you're not. But you will be. Regret is part of being alive. But keep it a small part.

Cally: As you do?

Avon: (Smiles) Demonstrably.

Tarrant: Ah, Cally - I've been going over that theory of yours about the teleport bracelets boosting each other. As you're aware, it doesn't make sense.

Cally: You have a better one?

Tarrant: There was some kind of power source on that alien ship that you were telepathically receptive to. When the teleport failed, you were able to use that source to get yourself out, and to get Avon and Vila out with you.

Cally (sarcastically): I seem to be more clever than I thought I was!

Tarrant: What I really want to know is why you're being so bashful. (serious) What are you hiding, and why?

Avon: Shut up, Tarrant.

Tarrant (angrily): Did you say something to--

Avon: I said, shut up. I apologise for not realising you are deaf.

Tarrant (to Avon): When you found me on the Liberator, it was quite a blow. And every time you look at me it hits you harder, doesn't it? I'm faster than you and I'm sharper. As far as it goes, I've made a success of my life. But you? The only big thing you ever tried to do you failed at. The greatest computer swindle of all time… but you couldn't quite pull it off, could you? If it hadn't been for Blake you'd be rotting on Cygnus Alpha right now. No, you failed, Avon. But I win. Not just at games. At life.

Avon: You also talk too much.

Tarrant: Be thankful I'm restricting myself to talk.

Avon: Well now, that's fascinating. You mean you can do something else?

Deyna: We need sleep, all of us. Even you need sleep, Tarrant.

Tarrant: And it'll all look better in the morning.

Avon: If it does, you can assume you're on the wrong ship.

Alien/Cally: I thought you were the clever one. You're a fool, like Tarrant! The pain Tarrant is experiencing ... visualise that pain and much more. You're as close to death as you have ever been. Think about human death, Avon, irrevocable...

Avon: I have thought about it, what's keeping you?

Alien/Cally: What did you say?

Avon: You claim you can kill me. You'd better get on with it. Make me die. There's nothing else you can make me do.

Ultraworld

Avon: Either it is dead or there is a total radio blackout. I wonder what they have to hide.

Dayna: I'm not keen on finding out.

Tarrant: This time, neither am I.

Avon: Don't you find it interesting?

Dayna: You'll be telling us next 'We can learn a lot from whoever built it'

Avon: Well we certainly have nothing to teach them unless it's how to remain ignorant. What do you think Cally? Shall we stay and observe or shall we scuttle off with our closed minds intact?

Tarrant: Touch of conscience?

Avon: More like insanity. You really believe in taking risks, don't you?

Tarrant: Calculated ones.

Avon: Calculated on what? Your fingers?

Vila: Come out, come out, wherever you are... help... I'm being got at...

Avon: Tell me, Orac, how precisely did Vila confuse and distract Ultraworld?

Orac: Quite simple. With a series of random and illogical brain impulses. The planet was programmed to assimilate orderly coherent thought patterns. Anything else confused it.

Vila: Eh?

Avon: You mean Vila spouted nonsense.

Vila: I resent that!

Avon: Oh, I wouldn't if I were you. Orac is saying that a logical, rational intelligence is no match for yours.

Moloch

Vila: I tell you, she's mad! She's finally gone over the top! Well, that's an interesting viewpoint, Vila. Yes, isn't it? Came from talking to myself. Fascinating. And do you have any other theories about... paranoids?

(Tarrant threatens Vila at gunpoint)

Vila: If it comes down to that, Tarrant, there isn't really a lot of point, is there?

Doran: Ahh, my problem was always women.

Vila: You like them?

Doran: No.

(The Liberator is being attacked by three of Servalan's ships)

Dayna: Do we fight?

Avon: Certainly not, we run.

Death-Watch

Avon: Put it on the main screen.

Orac: I must point out that this is a gross misuse and an absurd waste of my capabilities.

Avon: Put it on the main screen.

Orac: I will do it only under protest.

Avon: You can do it any way you like, just so long as you put it on the main screen.

Vila: Couldn't you re-design him as something useful, like a drinks dispenser? Or an empty space! I think he'd look really good as an empty space.

Vila (on Servalan): Her idea of chivalry is never to shoot a blind man in the back.

Dayna (pointedly, given that that's exactly what Servalan did to Dayna's father): That's very true, Vila.

Vila: Wonderful. And for my next trick I shall swallow my other foot.

Servalan: I don't think of you as an enemy, Avon. I see you as a... future friend.

Avon: Tarrant. I presume you have no tedious scruples about cheating and lying.

Tarrant: None at all.

Avon: (smiles) Oh good.

Terminal

Tarrant: How do we approve of something we don't know about?

Avon: You could try trusting me.

Tarrant: All right, Avon, we'll try trusting you. Just don't expect us to make a habit of it.

Tarrant: Oh, come on, Avon. Look, we've been through a lot together. We've always been at risk; we've always taken chances. But we've survived because we worked as a team. So what is it you have to do that makes this so different?

Avon: This happens to be my problem. None of you are involved.

Dayna: But we are involved. However much you like to pretend you're a loner, you're not really. We depend on each other; I wouldn't be alive now if it wasn't for you, and I'm sure that's true of everybody else. So why not trust us?

Vila: Look, you don't have to give reasons. You don't even have to explain. Whatever it is, we'll back you up.

Cally: Or, if you want one of your own cold, rational explanations, we can't afford to lose you.

Avon (poker-faced): Sentiment breeds weakness. Let it get a hold of you and you are dead.

Avon: One last thing. I don't need any of you. I needed the Liberator to bring me here so I had no choice but to bring you along, but this is as far as you go. I don't want you with me, I don't want you following me. Understand this: anyone who does follow me, I'll kill them.

(Tarrant and Cally are teleporting down despite Avon's orders)

Vila: What're you going to do if he spots you?

Tarrant: Duck.

Blake: It must have been so dull, having no-one to argue with.

Avon: Well now, there were times when your simple-minded certainties might have been refreshing.

Blake: Careful, Avon! Your sentiment is showing.

Rescue

Dayna: Don't you ever get tired of being right?

Avon: Only with the rest of you being wrong.

Avon: Stay here.

Vila: You wouldn't like to leave the gun?

Avon: That's right, I wouldn't.

Dayna: Cheer up, Vila. You've got a lot of very bright associates too.

Vila: Oh yeah? Name six.

Dorian: You're going to kill me anyway. Sooner or later.

Avon: You would prefer it sooner?

Dorian: Everything has it's price, Avon. You have to decide whether you want to pay it or not. That's all.

Vila: Well, I don't believe in paying.

Dorian: You mean you're here by choice?

Avon: He who trusts can never be betrayed, only mistaken. Cally once told me that that was a saying amongst her people.

Dorian: Cally?

Avon: Cally was murdered. So were most of her people.

[Dorian has found Orac to be uncooperative]

Dorian: Who designed it?

Avon: His name was Ensor.

Dorian: I should have known. He was never a gracious man. Orac reflects his personality.

Avon: Orac was the culmination of his life's work. [Avon removes Orac's key] He bequeathed it to an associate of mine who bequeathed it to me.

Vila: [Drinking a glass of Dorian's wine] There's something very suspicious about a man who keeps his booze under lock and key.

Vila: I'm going to give up drinking, you know. It'll be pink asteroids next.

Power

Pella: You must be very clever.

Vila: That's what I keep telling everyone. They even believed me in CF One.

Pella: CF One?

Vila: A sort of academy, when I was a boy. They chose me as technical advisor for the escape.

Pella: Escape? From an academy?

Vila: Perhaps academy was the wrong word.

Gunn Sar: Pick a weapon.

Avon: I'll have a neutron blaster.

Gunn Sar: No neutron blasters.

Avon: In that case I'll have a glove.

[Avon aims his gun at Pella's head]

Pella: That always was the easy answer for the man - the Hommik!

Avon: If you didn't want the answer, you shouldn't have asked the question.

Traitor

Avon: What is it, Orac?

Orac: You asked me to report any extension of the Federation Command Network. Magnatrix Terminal 406 is now programmed in.

Avon: What planet does the terminal serve?

Orac: Heliotrix.

Avon: [Astonished] Heliotrix.

Orac: It is the main terminal for the planet Heliotrix. The fact is checked and confirmed.

Avon: That means the Helots are back in the Empire. But they aren't the sort to cave in so quickly. It took the Federation years to subdue them on the first expansion.

Dayna: They've retaken Lubus and Porphia Major in the last few weeks. If Heliotrix has gone, that means the Federation now control most of Sector 4.

Vila: If they keep expanding at this rate, Avon, we don't have as much time as you thought. They'll be knocking on the door in a couple of years!

Avon: How are they doing it?

Vila: I don't know. But maybe we should start running now.

Soolin: [Discussing Vila] He doesn't have much time for Tarrant does he?

Avon: Ah well. Tarrant is brave, young, handsome. There are three good reasons for anyone not to like him.

Stardrive

Avon: [To Slave] Don't be sorry. Be quiet.

Avon:I'd rather be sure that dying is the best option we have!

Avon: Well, Orac, what do you think?

Orac: I think you have brought back a most fascinating recording.

Avon: We are looking for conclusions, not critical acclaim.

Vila: It's a Space Rat!

Soolin: Friends of yours?

Vila: Friends? Space Rats? There's no such thing as a friend of a Space Rat - they even hate each other!

Yarrant: What else do you know about them?

Vila: They're maniacs, psychopaths! All they live for is sex and violence, booze and speed. And the fellas are just as bad.

Vila: Well, perhaps we could hide under here. [Pulls the drape off a Space Chopper, then picks up a small device from its cockpit] Wonder what this thing does?

Bomber: (pointing gun at them) Tell you what this does - gook. It goes bang. And you go splat.

Animals

Vila: Why do I get all the dirty jobs?

Soolin: Typecasting?

Dayna (To Og): Og. I mean no harm, Og. I want to help. I am your friend, Og. I think Justin is also your friend. You're very hungry, aren't you? Very, very hungry.

Og Grrrrrrrr...

Headhunter

(After Muller has seemingly been killed)

Avon: Set up a decent orbit and you can teleport down.

Tarrant: Muller can't !

Avon: Well, we'll give him a refund on his ticket.

[Vila and Tarrant are stranded on Scorpio, without life-support]

Avon: Orac?

Orac(urgently): They must be left there!

Avon: To die?

Orac: There is no option. To reopen teleport contact could expose the base to undefined systems influence.

Avon: Oh, you'll have to do better than that, Orac, if you expect me to kill them.

Orac: I am obliged to do as you tell me, even though I know it to be wrong.

Avon: Only following orders. That's not very original, Orac.

Orac: There is nothing very original about domination, as you will discover.

Orac: Join us, Soolin. We can fulfil your every desire. (Soolin deactivates Orac)

Soolin: You wouldn't know where to start.

Orac: A new era, Avon. Mankind is now mastered by the fruits of his lustful creation. Accept slavery, or return to the caves stripped of all but the wheel, the plough and the sword, to compete once again as savages against nature.

[Tarrant destroys Muller's android]

Tarrant: Gone to the great cyberneticist in the sky.

Avon: You fool! It's superstitious half-wits like you who hold back every advance we make!

Orac: And arrogance, like yours and Muller's, Avon, which threatens to destroy -

Avon: Shut up!

Orac(sardonically): Yes, master!

Assassin

Servalan: Domo, the ninth. Five subjects.

Tarrant: Good is he? This 'Cancer'?

Avon: You can imagine how much it pains me to use the word 'infallible'.

Tarrant: Oh, come on. No-one's infallible.

Avon: Alright, then, he's not infallible. It's just that up till now he's never failed.

Neebrox: By the way, what's become of our little friend?

Soolin: She's found Cancer's cabin and made herself cozy for the duration.

Neebrox: Ah.

Soolin: Why? Do you fancy a little chat about the good old days on the chain gang?

Neebrox: Oh, it's terrible to think of a poor little thing like that being a slave, don't you think?

Soolin: No more terrible than to think of you as one.

Neebrox: Oh no, no, I'm an old man. She's merely a helpless little child.

Soolin: Well, I expect a little suffering will have helped to make her a better artist. [smiles]

Games

Avon: [Discussing Academician Gerron] As well as being a respected geologist and an expert on mining techniques he's also greedy, avaricious and a crook.

Vila: Does he have any faults?

Avon: Orac, are details of the orbiter contained in Belkov's computer?

Orac: I do not yet have enough data to reach a conclusion.

Avon: If it had the information, could you extract it? [Orac says nothing] Come on, that's a simple enough question.

Orac: [Hesitantly] There may be problems.

Avon: Why?! You've extracted information from Federation computers before, this is just a hotch-potch of three or four of them. You have already stated it is inferior to you.

Orac: It is not a question of superiority, but one of... attitude.

Avon: The logic of its creator.

Tarrant: I'm glad we didn't get too close.

Dayna: But after all that, we go home empty-handed.

Vila: Er, not entirely empty-handed. [produces Belkov's necklace] Well, I saw it lying about, seemed a pity not to take it. After all, Belkov won't be needing it where he's gone.

Avon: Let me see that.

Vila: I'd say the last game was mine, wouldn't you?

Avon: I have bad news for you, Vila. [smashes crystals with his gun butt] It's a fake. [savagely] End game to Belkov!

Sand

Reeve: No moonlight. What a pity.

Servalan: I have nothing to gain by tolerating you, Reeve.

Reeve: Oh, you sure of that?

Servalan: I suggest you go back to the fire. The alternative could be frostbite.

Reeve: I don't believe that. A woman like you?

Servalan: There is something you should realise. There are no women like me. I am unique. That makes me rather dangerous. Good night, Investigator. Sweet dreams.

[Reeve is sitting on a rock, fiddling with his gun.]

Servalan: Afraid it won't work, Investigator?

Reeve: [Points the gun at her] Afraid it will?

Servalan: You would be able to report, presumably, an excellent reason for killing me?

Reeve: One more casualty on Virn. You did kill the other one, didn't you? You might have had a motive. Something he found out.

Servalan: Reeve, you apparently think this is a new, exciting experience for me. It isn't. I've confronted several maniacs with guns.

Tarrant: You're possibly the most unscrupulously venomous woman in the galaxy. Being shut in here with you is rather like being locked in a cage with a panther. A black cat with large golden eyes, and long silver talons.

Servalan: Oh Tarrant, I'm just the girl next door.

Tarrant: If you were the girl next door, I'd move.

Servalan: Where would you move to, Tarrant?

Tarrant: Next door.

Avon: Orac, teleport.

Orac: Teleport? I am not programmed. Three squared to the principal.

Dayna: Oh, no.

Orac: I love you.

Vila: Orac!

Orac: My emotions are deeper than the seas of space. One times one is only possible in the ultra-dimensional.

Avon: Turn Orac off.

Orac: I love you.

Avon: Off!

Orac: We will be lovers for a little while, or maybe for a long while, who knows?

Soolin: I do. [Pulls key]

Gold

Keiller: Seventeen billion. That's what it's worth in direct exchange for cash.

Soolin: That's a lot of cash.

Keiller: The mine on Zerok, it's underground.

Dayna: Like most mines.

Keiller: [To guard.] It's all right, it's only Keiller. But this is Avon. [Keiller steps aside. Avon shoots the guard.]

Servalan: Avon, would you be careful with the gun. My guards have orders to shoot you first. The price of my life would be yours.

Avon: Well, now. The sacrifice might be worthwhile.

Orbit

Egrorian: Now, then, Avon. What would you say if I offered you mastery of the galaxy?

Avon: Oh, I would say thank you.

Vila: For a whole galaxy? Oh, come on, Avon, show the man some gratitude.

Egrorian: You really are an excessively cautious person, and so mistrustful.

Avon: That is because Orac has read your security file on Central Records.

Egrorian: Disconnect the funnel, Pinder. Lies! All lies! Base and perfidious slander! I never conspired... I, I swear this is nothing but a tissue of falsehood and calumny designed by my enemies to blacken my reputation. If Servalan has read this, I hope she...

Avon: Why do you mention Servalan?

Egrorian: What? Well, she was the head of Federation when these fabrications were compiled.

Avon: Didn't you hear she was dead?

Egrorian: Ah, yes. But then I was told she had assumed a new identity. One never knows what to believe these days. Anyway, this is, this... this is a load of distortion and rubbish, and when I return to earth, I will hound down those responsible, and...

Vila: Break their arms?

Egrorian: I suggest we get on. The tachyon funnel is disconnected. Place Orac here. Orac, what was the subject of my degree thesis at Belhangria University? Orac, what was the subject of my degree thesis at Belhangria University?

Orac: Your paper e stroke nine on stroke six zero four four was on particle physics and dealt specifically with the properties of rissions. It was marked Beta plus, Egrorian.

Pinder: Only beta plus, Egrorian?

Egrorian: Pinder, you're to be seen and not heard, remember?

Avon: If Orac has a fault, it is a tendency to give more information than is requested.

Vila: Or less information than requested.

Avon: But seldom just the information that is requested.

Orac: That degree was subsequently rescinded for gross misconduct.

Egrorian: That's enough, Orac!

(regarding ejecting weight from a shuttle to make it light enough to reach orbit)

Avon: Not enough! Not nearly enough! Dammit, what weighs seventy kilos?

Orac: Vila weighs seventy-three kilos, Avon.

Avon: Vila, are you here? I need your help.

Warlord

Vila: Avon's idea of diplomacy is to break your legs, then say "Lean on me."

Blake

Avon: Nobody is indispensable.

Soolin: You needed a figurehead. He was it. Or am I wrong?

Avon: You are right. But then figureheads aren't too difficult to come by. Any idiot can be one.

Dayna: Heh. On your feet, Vila. This could be your big moment.

Avon: Any idiot within reason, that is.

Tarrant: You going to tell us what we've got planned, Avon?

Vila: We know what we've got planned. Running away is what we've got planned.

Dayna: A strategic withdrawal is what we've got planned.

Vila: There's a difference?

Tarrant: Oh, yes. A strategic withdrawal is running away -- but with dignity.

Vila: So lay in a course and let's get the dignified hell out of here.

Tarrant: That isn't the plan anymore, though, is it Avon?

Avon: I think we can do better.

Vila: Does that mean safer?

Avon: In the end, winning is the only safety.

Vila: It doesn't mean safer. I didn't think it would.

Tarrant: So what does it mean?

Avon: It means I think we can find ourselves another figurehead, someone we can use to unify and expand the Rebel Alliance.

Soolin: Just like that.

Avon: More or less. He is strongly identified with rebels, you see, and very popular with rabbles. They will follow him, and he will fight to the last drop of their blood. [smiles] Idealism is a wonderful thing. All you really need is someone rational to put it to proper use.

Dayna: Someone like you.

Tarrant: So where do we find this useable idealist?

Avon: According to Orac, he is on a frontier planet called Gauda Prime.

Soolin: Gauda Prime?

Tarrant: You know it?

Soolin: Yes, I know it. It's a bad place to be. No self-respecting idealist would be found dead there.

Avon: I imagine that is what HE is trying to avoid: being found dead anywhere.

Tarrant: Look, are you going to stop playing games and tell us who it is, Avon?

Vila: It's Blake, isn't it? You think you've found Blake.

Avon: Orac, what proof do we have that Blake is on Gauda Prime?

Orac: That is where his trail ends.

Tarrant: What trail? Explain.

Orac: The chain of cause and effect amounts to a trail, if you can follow it.

Vila: I can't even follow you.

Orac: Everything has an effect on everything else around it. It is not easy to trace one line through the pattern of infinity. But in this case, I have. Blake is on Gauda Prime.

Tarrant: How long have you known?

Avon: [smiles] Long enough.

Dayna: Before Zukan.

Avon: Oh, yes. And the answer to your next question is, yes, I would have left Blake where he was and said nothing if things had gone according to plan.

Tarrant: Oh, I must try and work that into the conversation when we meet him.

Vila: If we meet him.

Soolin: Still not convinced?

Vila: You tell me what a line through the pattern of infinity is, and I'll tell you whether I'm convinced or not.

Avon: Orac?

Orac: A formal application was laid before the High Council on Earth within the last thirty days. I could get you the exact date --

Slave: Uh, I don't wish to interrupt, Master --

Orac: Then kindly don't.

Slave: I wasn't talking to you.

Orac: You were attempting to override a superior system. Be silent. [continues] -- the exact date, if you wish. But the importance of the application lies not in its exact date, but in its general requirements.

Tarrant: Which are?

Orac: That the citizens of Gauda Prime put their house in order. Law must be established before the benefits of law can be restored.

Avon: It is the day of the bounty hunter. [cut to close-up of Vila] Thieves, [cut to close-up of Dayna, pan to Soolin] killers, [cut to close-up of Tarrant] mercenaries, [cut to close-up of Avon; he smiles] psychopaths, are as unwelcome now as the farmers once were. [Scorpio's alarm goes off.]

Tarrant: Slave, what's wrong?!

Slave: Well, nothing is actually wrong, sir, yet.

Avon: Explain the alarm, Slave. [Alarm cuts out.]

Slave: I had to get your attention, Master, and I was forbidden to speak unless spoken to.

Avon: All right, you're spoken to. What is it?

Slave: I beg to advise you, Master, that we're approaching the planet Gauda Prime. And Scorpio is under attack! [An explosion rocks the flight deck.]

Tarrant: What on earth happened to you?

Blake: Oh, most of it wasn't on Earth. Not what happened to me.

Arlen: Do you want him killed?!

Blake: No, of course not! When he knows as much about this as you do now, he'll join us, like you did.

Arlen: He passed the test, then.

Blake: I'm satisfied.

Deva: These stupid games you insist on playing, Blake, will get someone killed eventually.

Blake: I have to test each one myself.

Deva: No, you don't have to! I set up systems for that. I broke the security codes on their central computer. I got us access to official channels, information, everything we could possibly need! You don't need to be involved at all.

Blake: All right, I find it difficult to trust. It's a failing, I admit--!

Deva: And any one of our people could select the people you've collected. You don't need to do the bounty hunter routine, either!

Blake: Indulge me.

Deva: Do I have a choice?

Blake: Oh, there's always a choice, Deva.

Deva: Not for me, there isn't. I said I'd follow you, and I will, until the Federation's finally destroyed. But if you're killed, where does that leave us?!

Blake: With a base, the beginnings of an army!

Deva: All of it useless if you're not there to lead it.

Blake: You worry too much, Deva.

Deva: Somebody has to.

Arlen: It might be an idea for somebody to start worrying about the one we just lost.

Blake: Why? He isn't armed.

Arlen: I didn't notice that slowing him up.

Blake: That's true. Relax, Deva. Nobody's indispensable.

Tarrant: He sold us, Avon. All of us. Even you.

Avon: Is it true?!

Blake: Avon, it's me Blake...

Avon: Stand still! Have you betrayed us? Have you betrayed *me*?

Blake: Tarrant doesn't understand.

Avon: Neither do I!

Blake: I set all this up!

Avon: Yes...

Blake: Avon, I was waiting for you...[Blake steps forward, Avon shoots him, three times. Dying:] Oh, Avon...

Vila: Oh, now, look, I've never been against the Federation. I mean, I've only ever been along for the ride. I'm not even armed. You can't kill me. I'm completely harmless and armless.